


Birthday in Vegas

by crackerscheese



Series: Birthday in... [1]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (1963), Doctor Who (2005), Doctor Who (TV Movie)
Genre: Birthday Party, Drunkenness, Humor, Partial Nudity
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-13
Updated: 2013-07-22
Packaged: 2017-12-08 09:14:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/759672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crackerscheese/pseuds/crackerscheese
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It is their 1,000th birthday, and each of the eleven Doctors will have an experience they'll NEVER forget.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

"The thing about you," said the Sixth Doctor to the Eighth Doctor, "is that you're too forgetful." They were at their 1000th birthday party with eight other Doctors in a pub in east London. 

"I am not forgetful," said Eight indignantly. "Wait, what were we talking about? Where are we? Who are you?"

Six sighed, patted Eight's brown hair, and walked over to the Seventh Doctor. "That's just-," said Six and sighed again, for once at a loss for words. 

Seven frowned. "I can't believe I'll become him one day," he said as he ducked a stray cricket ball, the seventh one in an hour. The Tenth Doctor wasn't as lucky, and was hit in the chest.

"It's a hit!" cheered the Fifth Doctor and he waved his cricket bat, which almost hit the Third Doctor. He managed to dodge it at the last minute and he glared at Five. 

Ten stood up. "I know you're my favorite Doctor and all, but if you want war, then it's ON!" he said as he took out a water pistol.

"Boys, boys, we can all be peaceful now, hmm?" said the First Doctor, sensing a fight. 

"Shut up, old man," muttered Five, who was busy preparing to whack Ten with his cricket bat. 

One was outraged. "It's on!" he yelled as he hit Five with a crumpet.

Soon enough, cricket bats, water pistols, and buttered crumpets turned into banana pies, carrot cakes, blue sonic screwdrivers and a recorder ("Hey, that's mine!" said the Second Doctor as he retrieved it).

The other Doctors, except the Ninth Doctor and Eight, got out of the war zone through the back door and filed out onto the sidewalk. "What do we do now?" asked the Eleventh Doctor as a carrot and jelly baby cake flew out of a nearby window and landed by his feet.

The Fourth Doctor, ever the optimist, took out six plates and forks, loaded the plates with the cake and handed them out to the Doctors while Three said, "I still have that bank account with UNIT. We could take out some money and go to Las Vegas."

"Vegas!" exclaimed Seven. "We have enough money for that?" Before Three could answer the back door opened and Nine came out. He struggled to close the door as some pies and Five's sonic screwdriver flew out.

Nine supported himself against the door after he closed it and gasped, "That was worse than the Time War." The other Doctors had heard of the War, (one Doctor lived through it) and they all raised their eyebrows. It couldn't be that bad, could it...

BOOM! A part of the pub exploded. "We were renting that," whispered Eleven in horror. 

As they watched the fire engines drive down the road Four turned to Nine and asked, "Cake?"

***888***888***

The 2nd, 4th, 6th, 7th, 9th and 11th Doctors waited outside the bank as the 3rd Doctor took out his money from his UNIT account. Six was gobbling down more cake, Four passed around jelly babies, Nine was taking a nap, Two and Seven did a recorder/spoon duet (it was horrible), and Eleven arranged his bow ties.

They had sat there for thirty minutes when Six asked, "Why did we leave Eight back there again?" 

They all shrugged. "Let's just hope he got out before the explosion," said Eleven. 

"But if he tried to get out with the r-rest of them, he'd forget why he was getting out," retorted Seven, rolling an r.

That left them in an awkward silence until Three burst out of the bank and thundered down the steps a few minutes later. All the movement jostled Nine awake and as rubbed his eyes he said groggily, "That took you look enough." 

Three frowned. "There were long lines. I knew I shouldn't have switched my account to Lloyd's back in 2010!"

"There doesn't seem to be many people out," pointed out Two. He was right. The parking lots were empty. 

Three grunted. "Alright, it took a while for the teller to get all my cash out in ones," he said. 

"Why did you ask for ones?" questioned Two. 

"So it would be harder for you to spend it all!" Three answered.

"I do not waste money!" Two protested.

"Do too!"

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

Two and Three glared at each other.

"So…" asked Nine, trying to defuse the situation. "How are we going to Vegas?"

Six laughed. "The TARDIS of course."

"But which one?" asked Eleven.

"Mine!" said Six and Seven. "Mine!" they repeated, now getting at each other's faces. "Mine!"

"Roll a dice!" said Eleven frantically. They both instantly cooled down and moved away from each other. 

"I'll take the even numbers!" said Six. 

"Why?" asked Seven. 

"Six is even and Seven is odd," explained Six. 

"How about if I want to have the even numbers?" asked Seven. 

"You snooze you lose pal," said Six. Before they argued further, Eleven rolled the die. It came out on a 4. Six stood up. "Hah!" he cheered. "My TARDIS everyone!"

Everyone followed him around a corner and down an alley to Six's TARDIS. "I thought it used to be cleaner," mused Eleven. 

Six glared at him. "Watch it baby face," he warned. Nine rolled his eyes. "You too, Big Ears," Six added. 

Nine cared enough to look insulted. Before he could retort, a voice from outside the alley said, "You were going to leave without us?"

The voice revealed itself to be Ten, with Five, One, and Eight in tow. 

"You all seemed busy," said Two awkwardly. Everyone nodded in agreement to that statement, even Three.

Five frowned. "It's still our birthday," he said. 

"It's also our birthday, and you were ruining it for us," said Nine. 

"You can't blame all of us for that. Five was the one who started it," whined Ten. 

Everyone turned to Five. "S-sorry?" he stuttered, uncomfortable with the situation. The conversation abruptly ended when the TARDIS light flickered once. 

"The TARDIS is impatient," explained Six. When no one moved he added hastily, "Come on!"

When everyone filed in and Six put in the coordinates One asked Three, "How much money do you exactly have, my boy?" 

Three thought for a while and said, "Around 690,000 pounds. Yep, definitely over 600,000." Everyone gaped at him. "What?" he asked, not really getting it. Suddenly the TARDIS lurched.

Nine glared at Six. "Get a grip on your TARDIS, man!" 

Six raised an eyebrow and grinned. "I'm not controlling the TARDIS," he said. 

Seven popped around the console beside Six and looked sheepish. "Sorry, we agreed that I will control the TARDIS. Just got a bit distracted there with the cash."

He pulled a lever and the TARDIS landed. Five looked at the scanner. Everyone held their breath as they awaited the results. "We're here!" he said. 

Everyone but Eight cheered, since he was confused again. "Where are we?" asked Eight. Six sighed and knocked heads with him. "Oww… wait, I'm the Doctor!" Eight said proudly.

"Finally, a breakthrough!" muttered Seven. 

Four came from within the TARDIS with a bucket full of jelly babies yelling, "It's time to PARTY!"

As everyone ran out to the bars and casinos, the Sixth Doctor locked the TARDIS. "It seems like it will be a long night, eh, old girl?" he whispered as he ran off to join the others.

TO BE CONTINUED


	2. The Awkward Search Party

12:20 A.M.-1:45 A.M.

The clock read four o’ clock in the morning when Seven woke up. At first he had a blinding headache as blood rushed to his head but that soon passed. His vision soon cleared and he realized he was tied upside down. He hung from ceiling hence the blood rushing to his head. He quickly untied himself and looked at the clock. He had read it upside down, and the actual time was 12:20 A.M.

According to his body clock he was asleep for an hour and a half. He tasted something in his mouth. The aftertaste of….

“Jelly babies?” he said out loud. 

“Actually, jelly babies dipped in vodka,” admitted a sheepish voice.

Seven turned around to face Six. Six wore the blue variation of his outfit, but his shoes mysteriously were gone. By the way, he was standing; Seven could safely assume that he was drunk.

“S-sorry we left you hanging there, S-seven,” Six slurred. “But Four and I got c-carried away with the c-carrot juice…”

“Wait, you tied me up?” asked Seven. 

Six looked at him strangely. “Yes, but you asked for it. You said you wanted ‘to show the the gods of Ragnarok who’s boss.’ Don’t you remember?” mimicked Six. 

Seven thought for a second. “No, the last thing I remember was you locking the TARDIS.”

Six laughed. “You’ve forgotten everything in your last incarnation? I can see why, since this was one wicked party. You got tied up, we all got drunk, I lost my underwear, and Four- wait, where is Four?” They both looked around the bar. It was empty with no sign of Four except for an occasional jelly baby on the floor.

“Maybe he went to the casino across the street,” suggested Seven. 

Six sighed. “Maybe he did. Come on!” he said as he opened the door.

When they walked onto the street, Seven noticed that in the square Eight was dancing around, with only a blanket covering him. It certainly left nothing to the imagination.

Six noticed Seven gaping at Eight and said reassuringly, “Don’t worry. He’s been doing that all night.” 

How that was supposed to be reassuring, Seven didn’t know.

When they went into the casino, they instantly saw that Four was here. Jelly babies were on the floor, nailed to the walls, in the fish tank, even in the toilet, as Six realized sometime later. There was no one here except for Two and Three, who were arguing as usual. This time it was about the casino machines.

“We should try the one over there,” said Two as he pointed to a machine in the back.

“This machine is perfectly fine,” argued Three. 

“We haven’t hit the jackpot for three hours now!” argued Two back.

“And we won’t hit it there either,” retorted Three. 

“Alright, if you won’t go I will!” Two started to walk away but then turned around and asked, “You do still have money on you, don’t you?”

Three sighed. “You wasted your money, didn’t you? I knew it! You’re not having any of mine!”

“Please?” Two begged. “No. The last time I gave you cash, you wasted it on a new coat. You don't even wear it!”

“Alright then, I’ll just get it myself,” Two said as he made a grab for Three’s wallet. 

Three moved out of his range and said angrily, “If you touch my cash again I’ll-” and what followed were some nasty curses in an alien tongue.

Two stepped back. “Alright, I’ll go! You don’t have to twist your knickers in a knot about it.” Two went to the door and noticed Six and Seven. They had worn faces of amusement throughout the argument, but their faces fell when the curses flew out. Two found them openly gaping at Three. Two waved his hands in their faces, yet they still stared at Three. “Hello, little hobo in the room, can you hear me?” he yelled. That got them out of their daze.

“Sorry, have you seen Four lately?” asked Seven as Six sneaked off to the bathroom. 

“Yeah a while ago, why?” asked Two. 

“We’re looking for him, do you know where he went?” questioned Seven while fiddling with his question mark umbrella.

“He spoke to Three mostly, I don’t think we should talk to him in the mood he’s in,” Two said. 

Seven put a hand on his shoulder and steered him toward Three. “Don’t worry; he won’t attack you when I’m here.” 

“Are you sure about that?” muttered Two.

Three had noticed them by then and said to him, “So you’re back.”

“Do you know where Four is?” asked Seven, taking charge of the conversation. 

“No. All he did was talk to me briefly and give me this,” Three said as he held some underwear. 

Six was back by this time and he exclaimed, “That’s mine!” as he snatched the underwear from Three’s hands. 

Three snickered. “Really, blue?”

“It matches the outfit,” Six grumbled. “Now all I need are my shoes.” They all looked down and realized they didn’t have shoes either. 

Suddenly Two muttered, “So that’s what they were.”

“What?” asked Seven, who overheard him.

“Come on!” Two exclaimed as he led them all outside and down the street. 

“Why are we here?” asked Three, who was now irritated.

“Look up,” was all Two said. They all looked up. Above them was a clothes line that hung all of their shoes, from the First Doctor’s to the Eleventh’s. 

“It certainly was ‘one wicked party’,” said Seven.


End file.
